time
Puns about time.
SleepWhat's the best way to see how long you sleep? By bringing a ruler to bed with you.Best Time6:30 is the best time on the clock. Hands down.BirthdaysWhy is your 32nd birthday always the shortest? Because it's only 30 seconds.ClocksWhat does a clock do when it's still hungry? It goes back four seconds.ATMsIf time is money, aren't ATMs time machines?KeyboardsI got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I wasn't putting in enough shifts.PhysicistMy physicist friend always tells inappropriate jokes about the 5th dimension. It's never the time or place.TimeSomeone finally told me my first 4th dimension joke today. It was about time.ClocksI looked at the clocks at the horologist's store as I walked home. It was a good way to pass time.WatchesI attached watches end to end to make a belt. It was a waist of time.Fish PreparationI'm going to teach you to cook. Lettuce begin. First you pick your fish for the halibut. Add some seasonings lightly, don't run out of thyme now!Time ConsumingI had a friend who would eat clocks for lunch. Eating with him was time consuming.