one liner
Puns about one liner.
BeeWhat do you call an indecisive bee? A maybe.Soccer PlayersI heard a rumor that Pelé was dead. After looking it up, he’s still alive and kicking.WiresMy kid was caught eating wires. I've grounded them until they've learned to conduct themselves properly.Home valuationI live next to a coin manufacturing plant. My house is valuable because it’s near mint!ButterI lathered myself up in butter just to see what would happen. I went downhill pretty quickly after that.Home BuildingI saw an ad that said "Buy one house, get roof free". I guess that means the roof is on the house.DrumsI like to listen to drum solos over and over again, but I'm afraid of any possible repercussions.CowWhat do you call a cow with a sunburn? Roast beef.LegosDid you hear about the excitement for the new Lego set? People were lined up for blocks!BloodWhat blood type results in grammatical errors on a keyboard? Type-O.Fence PostsWhy aren't fence posts any fun? They're all just a stick in the mud.GuitarFree guitar. Completely free. No strings attached.GasWhat gas weighs the least? Butane. It's a lighter fluid.OscarsDon't believe everything you see at the Oscars. Everyone is a paid actor.NoseWhy can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it'd be a foot!RunningI find if I get tired from running, I just have to stop running behind cars. It's exhausting.TwinsI have twin daughters. One's name is Kate, the other, Duplikate.CatsWhy do cats like bread? So they can loaf around the house.ZipposWhat's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.JokesA well developed joke always has a photo finish.Red PaintI dumped a bucket of red paint on someone I thought was wearing a fur jacket. They weren't. I really mis-red the situation.RichI have a friend who's very rich. It's from all the fortune cookies they ate.BagelWhat kind of bagels fly? A plain bagel!HearingWhat do you call a protagonist with abnormally good hearing? A Super Hearo.