All Puns
616 puns and counting.
Anti-GravityIt's impossible to put this book on anti-gravity down.Pencil TheftMy friend stole my pencil. A line was drawn that day.Shredding CheeseI always had issues shredding cheese. However, I have grater problems to deal with.IndecisivePeople were angry at me for being indecisive. I didn't know how to feel.MirrorI was thinking about buying this mirror for my room but was unsure if I liked it. I just needed to reflect on it for a bit.Pirates and MidgetsWhat did the Midget say to the Pirate? Look me Eye to Aye and say that again!FloodingThe flooding usually happens in August but happened in July. It was a monthsoon.FishingI tried fishing once. I was hooked.Space RocksWhy was the space rock tastier than the earth rock? It's a little meatier.SpringsWhy was the spring so nervous? Because it was wound tight!ProtestingIn protest, I got a shirt with California and Texas on it. I was making a state-ment.LaptopsThe army of laptops were all plugged in and ready to charge.IdentityI met a man who's name was Rob Bed. His identity must have been stolen.BicycleWhy did the bicycle fall over? It was two tired.CatsWhy does nobody believe lazy cats? Because they're liars.Teddy BearWhy doesn't a teddy bear eat cake on his birthday? He's stuffed.Cake CandlesWhy did the person get heartburn after eating the cake? They ate the candles.Peter PanWhat kind of cake does Peter Pan eat for his birthday? A Pan-cake. Get this on a greeting card!CandlesDid you hear about the birthday candle sale? It was a blow out!PickleThe pickle had a good birthday. She really relished it.ScreenshotImage: Picture of a phone screen, with a bullet from a gun sticking through it. A literal screenshot. Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/…Coffee CupThe person who had a coffee cup thrown at them went to the police station to report being mugged.PotentialThat guy had a lot of potential until I dropped him .GolferWhy did the golfer wear two pairs of socks? In case he got a hole in one.