All Puns
617 puns and counting.
PotentialThat guy had a lot of potential until I dropped him .GolferWhy did the golfer wear two pairs of socks? In case he got a hole in one.CoffeeCoffee isn't my cup of tea. Get this on a mugRoyal ToiletThe toilet in the poker addicted queen's bathroom has a deck of cards. There's always a royal flush. Get this pun on a shirt!Poop JokesPoop jokes aren't my favorite, but they are a solid number 2.SunshineA day without sunshine is like, dark.No ArmsDid you hear about the guy with no arms and his sandwich? He didn't make it.ShrimpWhat is it called when a shrimp kills another? A krilling spree!Guilty!I paid the judge a pile of hay to get out of jail. He accepted my bale payment.BoomerangA boomerang with computer RAM attached to it really brings back memories.MidgetThe midget never understood anything people said. I guess it went over their head.GunsI was asked if I wanted to try firing a shotgun. I guess I'll give it a shot.RollerbladesDid you hear about the guy who tried to buy rollerblades for $0.50? I guess you could say he was a cheapskate.PlantsYou can't plant seeds if you haven't botany.VacuumThis half clogged vacuum cleaner sucks.FeathersWhy did the feather, laying next to the brick, ignite? It was lighter.The dog zooI went to a zoo with all dogs. It was a shitzu.ApocalypsePeople keep making apocalypse jokes like there's no tomorrow.Steering WheelI saw a pirate with a steering wheel on his pants and I brought it to his attention. He simply responded "Aye, it's driving me nuts!"SnailMy snail was too slow, so I took the shell off to make him faster. All it did was make him sluggish.Boxers or briefsDo I prefer boxers or briefs? Depends.Brake FluidPeople told me that I'm addicted to drinking break fluid. I disagree. I can stop any time.AtomsDon't trust atoms, they make up everything.Stolen LampsThe guy who had every lamp in his house stolen was delighted when it happened.