one liner
Puns about one liner.
CloudsHow do clouds alleviate an itch? They find the nearest sky scraper.Best Time6:30 is the best time on the clock. Hands down.AppleWhat can a whole apple do that a half apple can't do? It can look round.Gate BuildersWhy don’t gate builders have any enemies? Because they always mend fences.Quick sandI've got a sinking feeling that I'm in quick sand...BooksDo you know how a book gets to be so think? It’s a long story.SQLA SQL query walks into a bar, approaches 2 tables, and asks "Can I join you?"HeavenWhat do they serve at birthday parties in heaven? Angel food cake.ElevatorsMy first time in an elevator was an uplifting experience. The second time, it really let me down.CowsWhy don't you see many cows working at leather factories? That's just how cows hide.DalmatianI wonder when the very first Dalmatian was spotted?CookieWhy did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crummy.AlligatorsHow do you treat a sick alligator? By giving it gator-aid.VelcroI never wear Velcro shoes. They're a rip-off.BoatsWhy do boats float? They give into pier pressure.ToothacheI told my dentist that I think I had a toothache. They told me it was all in my head.LuggageI told my suitcases that there will be no vacation this year. Now I’m dealing with emotional baggage.BirthdaysWhy is your 32nd birthday always the shortest? Because it's only 30 seconds.LazyI'm always getting yelled at for being lazy. I don't understand why. It's not like I did anything.BillboardsHow do billboards know what to display? They communicate in sign language.BikeWhat do you get if you cross a bike and a rose? Bicycle Petals!CheeseI try to make cheesy puns, but everyone I know is laughtose intolerant.IndependenceWhen I moved out into my own apartment, I hung up a copy of the US Constitution. I call it my declaration of independence.LimosI spent many years doing limo repairs. After all that time, I've got nothing to chauffeur it.