All Puns
617 puns and counting.
BalloonsThe cost to lift a house with balloons will go Up with inflation.Waffle CarsMy waffle maker made tiny waffle cars. It's the only time I enjoyed a traffic jam.Fortune TellersWhere's a fortune teller's favorite place to take a vacation? Palm Beach.HuntingI've never hunted bear, but I have been fishing in shorts.NuclearWhy do the nuclear scientists always have spouses? Because they're just so radiant!ActorsWhy do actors love their job so much? It's all play.Female DeersWhy did the female deer need to take out a loan? She wanted a few bucks.AstronautsWhen do astronauts eat? At launch time!Water DropletsWhy are water droplets at high elevations tastier than at sea level? Because it's Mountain Dew.PetsI have a pet who loves to float and signal boats in the water. He's a good buoy.DogsWhy can't dogs get MRIs? Only CAT scan!DoctorsA doctor who likes to audition for roles in a play broke his foot. Luckily he still made the cast.Feeling DownOne day, I was feeling down and my friend said "It could be worse. You could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I think he meant well.PlateausPlateaus are the highest form of flattery.Math TextbooksWhy was the Math textbook at the psychiatrist? Because it has a lot of problems that need to be worked out.CountriesWhat country is it obvious that you're no longer there? Uganda.ClownsWhich planet does a circus travel from? Saturn, because it has 3 rings.GasI don't understand odorless gas. They don't make scents.Secret AgentsWhy are secret agents always so well rested? Because they're always undercover.OwlsWhy are owls who lose their voice such rebels? They don't give a hoot.BathLast I time I took a bath I got a sunburn. Last time I try sunbathing!Pork RoastWhen I'm sad, I like to make pork roast. This gives me a shoulder to cry on.MissionaryWhat is a missionary's favorite type of car? A convertible.CoinI tried to solve a problem by flipping a coin, but it was a toss-up.